10.29.2008

If tempted...DON'T DO IT!!

Why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why? I asked myself a thousand times over and every time came up with the same resounding and emphatic, "I DON'T KNOW!!" Anytime you think twice to yourself and say, "I really shouldn't be doing this," listen and don't do it!

So, it all started harmlessly this weekend. I was pulling into the way-too-small-rear-parking-lot and my neighbor was standing out back smoking a cigarette. We small talked a little about the heat and other random apartment-related topics. I then complained about the smell of my rental car (Old Milly is sick in the shop and my Mom was coming in town for the weekend) and insisted that he check it out to confirm that I'm not being unreasonable by having them give me a different car. He suggested that I roll the windows down and let it air out.

After giving him a look of disdain and shock, I said, "No way. I don't want to get bugs in my car!"

He said, "I leave my windows down for weeks at a time and there are no bugs in my car."

"Ha! There are definitely bugs in your car. I get spider webs in my car and I leave the windows up! You're totally driving around with bugs!"

"Well, if you're worried about bugs I probably shouldn't........ha.......uh........Andy and I have both seen mice in our apartments," he revealed with hesitancy.

"What?!" Apparently the apartment below me and next to me have mice...one general conclusion can be made...I have mice! "No you do not!" I challenged him.

"Oh, but I do. I saw one run across my kitchen floor one night at about 2:30 am."

Naturally, I gave him a typical Mom Kim speech about how that wouldn't have happened if he had been sleeping like all the other good little boys and girls at that hour. And we left it at that.

I spent all weekend insisting that my mom was careful walking around eating because I didn't want her to drop any crumbs and feed the mice. Well tonight I was laying in my recliner reading for my Wednesday night book study at church and thought, "hmmmm, I wonder if I had mice where they would be...Don't do it Kim. Stop. Don't get up." Oh, I've done it now. I got up and walked into the "kitchen", with by the way, is connected to every other "room" in my studio apartment. I peeked behind the oven. I couldn't really see so I started turning on all the lights in that area--my bathroom lights, kitchen sink light, stove light--it was bright enough to start landing planes in here.

Lo and behold I see not one, but two little mice. A nice little pair--one brown one and one white one. What the heck am I supposed to do?! I can't see them very well, but can they see me? My initial reaction was to tap on the stove, which I did, and fortunately they didn't respond at all. "Ok. So they think they are sneaky and hiding.... Wait, what if they had run, where would they have gone? Bad idea, Kim." All tapping quickly ceased. At this point I realized my reading for the week was not going to get done because not only had I succeeded at ruining my dinner, robbing myself of peace in my own apartment, and assuring that I never get a sound night of sleep again, I could no longer concentrate on reading about the Wisdom of God. On top of all that, I could not longer convince myself that the noises I heard at night were the heating pipes or plumbing. No. Now I am confident that the noises I hear are little mice families feeding their little mice babies, taking them to mice school, and doing whatever else little mice villages do inside peoples' walls.

At this point it's time to leave for church. I go to the study, mildly distracted by my mice colony, and then arrive back at home. The first thing I did upon walking up the stairs was knock on my neighbor Mike's door. "Do you have a flashlight?" I asked. "Somewhere, what for?" he responded. "Oh, you know, I was just checking for mice and I think I saw some behind my stove." After a futile search for the flashlight he comes back with a class project that involved creating a circuit board and attaching Christmas lights and programming different rhythms/patterns of flashing. Great, so we can't see the mice, but we'll at least try to kill 'em by inducing a seizure with the psychedelic mini strobe lights. Perfect.

Well Mike squats down and stares for a good 10 seconds with no response. Panic is running through my blood. At what point do I jump on the couch or coffee table? Is this really happening to me? He looks at me and says, "You don't have a cat do you?"
"No, why?"
"Ha. I think these are cat toys."
"What? No! It's real. Maybe it's dead. Do I have dead mice back there?"
"It's got googly eyes. It's not real. I'll get it out and show you."

Sure enough there are two mice "cat toys" behind my oven. I insisted on leaving them there in case they are actually scarecrows of sort, kind of like hanging an owl, frightening mice to stay out of my apartment. So, to date, I have not witnessed first hand any mice in my apartment and I will hopefully stay mice-free with the help of my mice-deterrent mice couple. If you were planning on visiting me, please don't cancel your plans, yet.

5 comments:

  1. Oh my word! Only Kim! While I was reading, I began to think that I may never bring Reagan to visit you because she'll be crawling soon and I don't want her in any of your mouse funk. But then I read your last line and I think that was specifically for me...

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  2. Rebecca Catherine! You are NOT allowed to not visit me on account of my rodent problem! I will vacuum up all the droppings before you get here:) I feel discriminated against! You will most certainly bring Reagan for visits with Aunt Kim.

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  3. I would LOVE to, but I think we need more than just a vacuum! Sterilization please!!!

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  4. Picky, picky, picky. Will do.

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